Most American sports fans, whether they are football fans or not, play fantasy football. It’s one of those “things” that we do – like eating cheeseburgers and drinking Bud Light and talking about cars and dissecting your weekend around the water cooler.
But let’s take it a step further.
If we’re drafting football players to score points based on arbitrary numbers in a multi-billion dollar industry, why can’t we just keep adjusting the rules?
Who says that running backs must get 1 point per 10 yards and 6 points per touchdown, etc.?
Why can’t we just incorporate more fake football into fake sports?
Let’s change the rules.
Think about this – Bo Jackson in Nintendo’s Tecmo Bowl is the greatest video game character ever. He’s better than Michael Vick in in the 2004 Madden. He’s better than Larry Bird at the three-point line in Jordan vs. Bird. He’s better than LeBron James in the new NBA Jam. He’s better than Mike Tyson in Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!
OK, so the idea would be to draft a video game sports star in a video game sports fantasy league. It doesn’t have to last 15 rounds or else you’d end up with Al Pedrique from RBI Baseball.
Bo Jackson is clearly the best choice. As much as every 1980s Nintendo nerd knows the Up Up Down Down etc. code for Conta, we know that Bo Jackson can not be stopped. Even when the opponent calls the same play, resulting in the defense crushing the offensive line and powering into the backfield, Bo still managed to gain positive yardage.
Bo’s legacy in Tecmo Bowl was so great that there are people wearing T-shirts with his 8-gigabyte likeness.
Show me a shirt of Tiger Woods in Tiger Woods PGA Tour and then maybe there’s a discussion.
If such a league were created, then Bo Jackson would be the end-all, be-all No. 1 pick.
The thing that’s often overlooked with Tecmo Bo is that there were a few other fantastically designed players in that game – notably Lawrence Taylor and Ronnie Lott. They would be second round draft choices in a fantasy gamer’s league.
The thing that puts Bo Jackson ahead of the pack is that most every other video game character was beatable. He was the one, digitally, who could not be stopped. Because of that he was the best there ever was. Tecmo Bowl was probably produced after Bo went nuts on the Seahawks – running for a 90-yard score and plowing over Brian Bosworth for a touchdown.
So, think about it: a fantasy sports league based on video game characters. Let’s not forget that numerous sports stars had their own video games in the 1990s – Ken Griffey Jr., Charles Barkley, Wayne Gretzky, etc. – and, therefore, were pretty unstoppable.
After Bo, who goes No. 2? (That sounds like a question for someone who is about to poop.) How do you score such a league?
The answer to the first one is not easy. There are many capable digital athletes out there. The second answer is simpler – play a full season with your digital players and keep accurate stats. Combine your normal sports fantasy league point systems and then determine a winner.
(i.e. If you have three football players, five baseball players, two basketball players, etc. then just follow the ordinary fantasy scoring in each of those leagues and add it all together. Voila! You have a fantasy sports league based on video games!)
All we know is that Bo Jackson is the best there ever was and ever will be.